G.O.O.D.
God- Odds- Opportunity- Discovery-
I have to say, I’m not a big fan of acronyms or cliches, but honestly, sometimes, it is what it is—cliche or not.
I wish my heart could speak. Truly, beat out at least one measly word for the last 10 years—just one. I have always been one to plan out my words, to follow my heart, yet analyze it first, so that I can tangibly convey my emotions. This, of course, was necessary to explain myself if need be. Perhaps, more accurately, to affirm myself to my self. Because a solid explanation is always needed in life, right?
Nope.
I have always been told, “Some things are unexplainable.” Some are simply felt—-experienced. Not a picture, not a word, only experience can truly define or capture life when it involves the entire self. A mere word could never suffice. After a decade of childhood school days and/or systematically structured life, I have come to my own conclusion that life is good. Not in the cheap, lackluster sense, but Life is Good when it is real; throughout the duration of the good and the bad, just the reality of each day when I cut it down to the core—Life is g.o.o.d.
I found God ten years ago. I always knew He was around, and the way I figure it, He’s kinda like Santa Claus, “He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you’re awake, He knows if you’ve been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake…” Moreover, I actually have come to catch glimpses of this “Being” that a majority of humans recognize in one way or another, and not just on Christmas Eve. In a quite humorous vein, I am at a point that I believe the aforementioned carol isn’t too far off when it comes to God. There spirit in this life that surpasses our own understanding as human beings yet seems to be within, among and around us all. The Spirit was with the generations who have come before, and I venture to say with the many to follow. Ten years ago, I made the decision to make the observation time that God had of me, similar to Santa’s watchful eye, more of a conversation. I dared to attempt the impossible—talk to Him. And like any running conversation, there have been interruptions, dropped calls, intense moments as well as silent ones, even those special encounters when nothing needs to be said at all. And, of course, there have been tears as well as smiles. Some points I want to talk, others, not so much. Our conversation could be a short text or an in-depth call that runs into the wee hours of the night…maybe even a meal shared or a jovial laugh. This I have experienced and somewhere within the depths of me, know I always will.
Sticking with my acronym, In the GOOD, with God, there have also been Odds. Odds have come in life and I expect that only a fool could say they have gone for good. These odds, whether deserved or chosen, forced or anticipated, have hurled me into action. Like when caught in on-coming traffic, decisions needed to be made, consequences were faced, more choices presented themselves and the trip continued. A random saying presented it self to me years ago, and has found residence in my being: “Real shit is better than plastic flowers.” The truth of Life. It may not be pretty, but that truth is truth and truth is real. No faking, just living. It may be hideous, daunting and debilitating at times, but there is no other way to go. Trials reveal truths unseen and told. Odds force change and change is different. We can have a place in change. Life may not be easy, but if it is evolving, it is alive. And if I am part of it, I too will evolve.
When Odds force change, change means different and different means Opportunities arise and choice is present. Are we? The question does not stand if there are choices presenting themselves during change, but moreover if we are present to make a choice. In times of change am I willing to explore my options, no matter how bleak they may seem? Am I willing to be patient, listen to others and seek out others’ advice and counsel when it is answer time? I am willing to accept that God is present in the odds and holds opportunities?
I have found that Discovery will come if I choose to participate. If I choose to have the faith to stand, the courage to get back up, believing in more and putting that belief into action, life will open its doors to me. To discover, I have had to go through it all…I needed to believe in more than just me, because odds came and they were bigger than me. I needed to believe to survive, to listen, to see, to walk and explore—overcome, risk and discover.
Life isn’t good because nothing is wrong—life is good when it is being lived—when we are being, “…good for goodness sake.” We have to choose.
God is here, odds will come, and opportunities will present themselves because there are discoveries to be made. All compose Life. And Life is to be lived.
So I begin a new chapter, one in Pasadena, in seminary, pursuing this God who has so intimately and consistently pursued me.
